There is a hotly contested senate race with Kay Hagan and Tom Tillis trying to win. voting for one of them is like deciding to shoot yourself in the head or in the mouth: the results are still suicide. If each candidate is as evil as the other one says, then we need neither. I'm not voting for Tom Tillis because Kay Hagan supports the President anymore than I would vote of Kay Hagan because Tom Tillis sides with big business over the individual. To me that indicates but are wrong.
I wish we had a third option, and not just a candidate from a third party, but a choice to vote against a candidate. Say, if there are 100 people voting and 7 vote for the third party then one of the two main candidates will win, even if half the voters don't vote because they like neither candidate.
But what if those fifty who voted didn't like either candidate either but just felt compelled to pick the lesser of two evils. Well, that's like only putting 4 bullets in a six shooter and only pulling the trigger 3 times: you are still dead.
It would make sense to put an against option on the ballet. That way you can vote for one, or vote for the other or vote against both. That option gives power to people who are feed up with no real voice in the community. Up till now the only choice you have is to vote for one or the other or not vote and let someone choose for you. With the against option then if neither candidate is acceptable
the there is a chance enough against votes will force the parties to pick more acceptable candidates.
But for now we are stuck with the old system. Vote but for for the third party: no one is saying anything bad a out them.
Friday, October 31, 2014
Saturday, October 25, 2014
Does sentimental value remain after death?
A lady grew up during the depression and over the course of her lifetime she had purchased items that meant something to her and some other things were given to her. She has lived in the same home for almost sixty years. It's a small two bed room ranch home. She had a collection of dinner bells, probable three or four hundred of them.
I said had as if she were dead already but she isn't. One of her sons is having her move in with him with the intention of bringing her home so she can die in her own home. The home is neat but every square inch of storage space is utilized to the max. There is the attic, the partial basement and the storage space under the deck. The carport was converted into a living space.
She said that she wants items personal to her to remain so she can be surrounded by the objects she loves at her death. I don't know if it is possible for things to happen the way she wants but that is the plans. We always don't get to pick where we will be when we die.
The house is stuffed full of stuff, there is damage to some of the walls and ceilings and it has lots and lots of furniture. Somehow one of the brothers, the successful rich one, thinks he can clean the house and get it ready to sell in three or four days. I know what his intentions are. He'll hire a professional cleaning crew who will bring out a dumpster and he'll instruct them to throw everything thanks in the house into it, then have them wash and mop and think he's done a good job.
Mom loves her stuff plus there is a lot of value, intrinsic and sentimental, to many of the objects she has. If the items meant a lot to her should her children value that item as well and see that it is sold or given a good home or should it just be junked like worthless trash?
I said had as if she were dead already but she isn't. One of her sons is having her move in with him with the intention of bringing her home so she can die in her own home. The home is neat but every square inch of storage space is utilized to the max. There is the attic, the partial basement and the storage space under the deck. The carport was converted into a living space.
She said that she wants items personal to her to remain so she can be surrounded by the objects she loves at her death. I don't know if it is possible for things to happen the way she wants but that is the plans. We always don't get to pick where we will be when we die.
The house is stuffed full of stuff, there is damage to some of the walls and ceilings and it has lots and lots of furniture. Somehow one of the brothers, the successful rich one, thinks he can clean the house and get it ready to sell in three or four days. I know what his intentions are. He'll hire a professional cleaning crew who will bring out a dumpster and he'll instruct them to throw everything thanks in the house into it, then have them wash and mop and think he's done a good job.
Mom loves her stuff plus there is a lot of value, intrinsic and sentimental, to many of the objects she has. If the items meant a lot to her should her children value that item as well and see that it is sold or given a good home or should it just be junked like worthless trash?
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
I Apologize
I owe my pastor and my Sunday School class an apology which I will deliver in person at the beginning of my next class. A month or so ago I asked the question "Which tribes belonged to the Southern Kingdom of Israel"? The pastor gave the correct answer but I stated the correct answer as Rueben, Gad, and the half tribe of Manasseh which is incorrect. Those tribes and half tribe are the peoples of Israel that did not cross over the river Jordon when Israel entered the Promised Land. The correct answer, as stated by the pastor, was indeed Judah and Benjamin.
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
Security sorta works
Friday night I left my rock bar, a plastic cart, and my potato hoe in my trailer so I could have an early start Saturday morning when I planned on taking advantage of the cities annual mulch sale. I needed some at the church around the trees I planted and I needed a little more at home. With the 4-prong potato hoe it is much easier to unload the mulch than with a steel rack. Saturday morning it was missing.
I am meticulous about putting my tools away but I thought just once for my convenience I would leave the potato hoe out so the beeping of the shed alarm wouldn't bother my sleeping wife. The first and only time I've left a tool out and it turns up missing. Go figure.
I didn't lose much as far as monetary value as the head of the potato digger once belonged to my neighbor. Someone set his shed on fire .and the wooden handle of the digger burned off so he just tossed what was left away. I just happened to have a broken handle from an old tool so I put the potato digger head on my old handle and duct taped it on. It made a useful tool which I have used for several years now. One thing for sure, it wasn't worth the price of the penalty one would have to pay if they were caught stealing it.
I'm sure they didn't take the plastic cart because it would have been too big and cumbersome for a quick grab and run theft. The thing of value was the rock bar but it was black and was in a black trailer at night and mostly covered by the tarp. I'm sure if given a choice most people would much rather have had the rock bar, especially if they were taking something to sell. The potato digger is virtually worthless.
I'm not sure what would have been taken if I didn't have a security system. My shed is wired with an alarm system as is my house. I also have motion sensory lights on the front porch and back porch as well as on the driveway side of the shed. I would like to think the motion sensor lights would have come on and frightened the thief away (but only after the thief took my potato digger).
I am meticulous about putting my tools away but I thought just once for my convenience I would leave the potato hoe out so the beeping of the shed alarm wouldn't bother my sleeping wife. The first and only time I've left a tool out and it turns up missing. Go figure.
I didn't lose much as far as monetary value as the head of the potato digger once belonged to my neighbor. Someone set his shed on fire .and the wooden handle of the digger burned off so he just tossed what was left away. I just happened to have a broken handle from an old tool so I put the potato digger head on my old handle and duct taped it on. It made a useful tool which I have used for several years now. One thing for sure, it wasn't worth the price of the penalty one would have to pay if they were caught stealing it.
I'm sure they didn't take the plastic cart because it would have been too big and cumbersome for a quick grab and run theft. The thing of value was the rock bar but it was black and was in a black trailer at night and mostly covered by the tarp. I'm sure if given a choice most people would much rather have had the rock bar, especially if they were taking something to sell. The potato digger is virtually worthless.
I'm not sure what would have been taken if I didn't have a security system. My shed is wired with an alarm system as is my house. I also have motion sensory lights on the front porch and back porch as well as on the driveway side of the shed. I would like to think the motion sensor lights would have come on and frightened the thief away (but only after the thief took my potato digger).
what is fair isn't always fair.
what is fair isn't always fair. Strange headline I know but it is true. Here is the situation. Mom is almost blind and deft and has become feeble in the past few weeks that it has become obvious she can no longer take care of herself. Mom has three sons, one lives in Georgia, one in South Carolina and one in Randleman. Mom lives in Hickory.
My younger brother is a businessman and has made a lot of money . Even though he is retired, he is still working full time. My older brother is a plant manager for a large manufacturing plant and makes a descent salary. He also draws social security. My one sister-in-law, my younger brothers wife is also an accountant and she still works.
I'm retired and do not work and my wife is disabled. We have always been just plain ole working stiffs, church going people who support their church to the tune of at least 15% of their income and sometimes to to 20%. Honestly if we didn't give we would have never made it. Seriously.
Anyway, Mom will have to either have an in home care giver or go into a rest home. If she takes the second offer then my younger brother has purposed three solutions, the first two are out of the realm of possibilities. The third is doable and fair. We float a loan, split the downpayent three ways and well as the monthly payment it seems fair anyway. Except for one thing. I'm the only one who doesn't work and the only one who lives close enough to take care of the house. Afterall, the assests have to be liquidated or disposed of, the house cleaned and the repair work completed.
Yea, it would be nice to split the cost three ways then have just one brother do all the physical labor but that isn't fair, is it/
My younger brother is a businessman and has made a lot of money . Even though he is retired, he is still working full time. My older brother is a plant manager for a large manufacturing plant and makes a descent salary. He also draws social security. My one sister-in-law, my younger brothers wife is also an accountant and she still works.
I'm retired and do not work and my wife is disabled. We have always been just plain ole working stiffs, church going people who support their church to the tune of at least 15% of their income and sometimes to to 20%. Honestly if we didn't give we would have never made it. Seriously.
Anyway, Mom will have to either have an in home care giver or go into a rest home. If she takes the second offer then my younger brother has purposed three solutions, the first two are out of the realm of possibilities. The third is doable and fair. We float a loan, split the downpayent three ways and well as the monthly payment it seems fair anyway. Except for one thing. I'm the only one who doesn't work and the only one who lives close enough to take care of the house. Afterall, the assests have to be liquidated or disposed of, the house cleaned and the repair work completed.
Yea, it would be nice to split the cost three ways then have just one brother do all the physical labor but that isn't fair, is it/
Monday, October 20, 2014
Any teachers out there?
Have my Sunday School class does their lessons but the other half makes no effort at all. If I ask a question I gey no response from anyone even though they have the answer. it seems I can never illcit much of a response much less a discussion. So, how do I get more class participation?
Thursday, October 16, 2014
12 year old commits suicide over cyber bullying
In todays news a twelve year old girl killed herself because of being bullied. Not physically bullied. No, that had stopped when she changed schools. No, she was being bullied on the internet, in particular on Facebook. I have a Facebook account. I have friends on Facebook. In order to be my friend I have to accept your invite. You can't be my friend unless I want you to be. Even then if you post something I don't like I can delete that post and if you persist I can unfriend you. I don't have to belong to Facebook either. In fact, I don't have to participate in social media at all.
You cannot bully me unless I allow you to bully me. This young girl killed herself over something someone said that they didn't have to read. How very sad.
You cannot bully me unless I allow you to bully me. This young girl killed herself over something someone said that they didn't have to read. How very sad.
Thursday, October 09, 2014
Sometimes its better not to do any favors
My wife and I stopped at Wendy's today. I wanted to try their new BBQ sandwich. I ordered a BBQ sandwich and a soda and my wife wanted the BBQ fries and a lemonade. "I can save you money if you get the combo. "
"But I don't want fries' I replied.
Well the clerk rang me up a small combo anyway.
The BBQ sandwich was $4.49, the BBQ fries was $2.89, the soda was a $1.49 and the lemonade was &1.79 for a total of $10.66 (not including tax)
The clerk rang up a small combo at $6.69, a BBQ fry at 2.89, a lemonade at 1.79 and a soda at 1.49 which totaled 12.86. I explained to the clerk that she charged me for a soda that was supposed to be include and didn't give me a fry which goes with a combo. I didn't want the fries to begin with so I made her cancel the entire order and ring it the way it should have been totaled to begin with. While she was re-ringing the order other workers were busy filling my tray with sandwiches I didn't order.
The whole incident left a bad taste in my mouth (pardon the pun) embarrassed the clerk, I'm sure and put a damper on an otherwise perfect day. I don't know why I have such a hard time when I go into a restaurant, especially a fast food joint. I speak slowly and clearly but it seems there is always a problem. I went to Bo jangles once and every time I named an item I want the clerk would yell it into his mike. What he rang up, what I ordered and what I was given didn't even come close to being the same.
Once at Arby's I ordered an apple turnover and was given a cherry one with chocolate glaze. My wife and I were going to split it so I cut it in two pieces. My wife took a piece to show the clerk we had received the wrong turnover. In stead of fixing the problem the clerk said 'Well, I see you've already eaten half of it." I took the other half up and asked for an apple turnover, not saying anything about her smart remark. This time I received a chocolate turnover. This time I took the whole thing back and asked for a refund. The clerk at first refused and tried to make me wait until she found an apple turnover.
I went to Hardees and ordered two cod fillet sandwiches and a chicken burrito. I was given two chicken sandwiches and a fish taco.
If it happened just once and in a while, which I fully expect it does to every one, it would be understandable. I think the problem is most clerks really don't know how to think and customers don't know how to order. A clerk normally has to ask a customer a lot of questions in order to record an order.
I'll go into, say Burger King, and say "This order is dine-in. I want the number 2 combo, small, with cheese, light mayo, lettuce and tomato and a number two combo, small, no cheese, with onion rings instead of fries." More often than not, the clerk will ask ;Is this dine-in or carry-out?"
So now I have to repeat the entire order and when I'm finished the second time the clerk asks "Did you want cheese on both combos?"
I thought maybe I was giving the clerk too much information at once so I decided to be like every one else and make the clerk ask. My order was still screwed up.
In all honesty I appreciate the girl at Wendy's efforts to save me some money and if I had received the fries and not been double charged on the soda I would have not said anything about the fries I really didn't want. When I placed my order and it seemed obvious she wasn't going to ring it like I asked her too It was just far easier to let her do it her way. For the most part most places quickly correct mistakes and I realize most fast food clerks are young and inexperienced so I'm patient with them. But tonight was different. The clerk wanted to argue with me that she was saving me money by charging me for something I didn't want, couldn't understand when I explained I hadn't received what I had been charged for, gave me a refund and then tried to charge me again for what she just gave me a refund on. Sometimes it is just best to not do some one a favor.
"But I don't want fries' I replied.
Well the clerk rang me up a small combo anyway.
The BBQ sandwich was $4.49, the BBQ fries was $2.89, the soda was a $1.49 and the lemonade was &1.79 for a total of $10.66 (not including tax)
The clerk rang up a small combo at $6.69, a BBQ fry at 2.89, a lemonade at 1.79 and a soda at 1.49 which totaled 12.86. I explained to the clerk that she charged me for a soda that was supposed to be include and didn't give me a fry which goes with a combo. I didn't want the fries to begin with so I made her cancel the entire order and ring it the way it should have been totaled to begin with. While she was re-ringing the order other workers were busy filling my tray with sandwiches I didn't order.
The whole incident left a bad taste in my mouth (pardon the pun) embarrassed the clerk, I'm sure and put a damper on an otherwise perfect day. I don't know why I have such a hard time when I go into a restaurant, especially a fast food joint. I speak slowly and clearly but it seems there is always a problem. I went to Bo jangles once and every time I named an item I want the clerk would yell it into his mike. What he rang up, what I ordered and what I was given didn't even come close to being the same.
Once at Arby's I ordered an apple turnover and was given a cherry one with chocolate glaze. My wife and I were going to split it so I cut it in two pieces. My wife took a piece to show the clerk we had received the wrong turnover. In stead of fixing the problem the clerk said 'Well, I see you've already eaten half of it." I took the other half up and asked for an apple turnover, not saying anything about her smart remark. This time I received a chocolate turnover. This time I took the whole thing back and asked for a refund. The clerk at first refused and tried to make me wait until she found an apple turnover.
I went to Hardees and ordered two cod fillet sandwiches and a chicken burrito. I was given two chicken sandwiches and a fish taco.
If it happened just once and in a while, which I fully expect it does to every one, it would be understandable. I think the problem is most clerks really don't know how to think and customers don't know how to order. A clerk normally has to ask a customer a lot of questions in order to record an order.
I'll go into, say Burger King, and say "This order is dine-in. I want the number 2 combo, small, with cheese, light mayo, lettuce and tomato and a number two combo, small, no cheese, with onion rings instead of fries." More often than not, the clerk will ask ;Is this dine-in or carry-out?"
So now I have to repeat the entire order and when I'm finished the second time the clerk asks "Did you want cheese on both combos?"
I thought maybe I was giving the clerk too much information at once so I decided to be like every one else and make the clerk ask. My order was still screwed up.
In all honesty I appreciate the girl at Wendy's efforts to save me some money and if I had received the fries and not been double charged on the soda I would have not said anything about the fries I really didn't want. When I placed my order and it seemed obvious she wasn't going to ring it like I asked her too It was just far easier to let her do it her way. For the most part most places quickly correct mistakes and I realize most fast food clerks are young and inexperienced so I'm patient with them. But tonight was different. The clerk wanted to argue with me that she was saving me money by charging me for something I didn't want, couldn't understand when I explained I hadn't received what I had been charged for, gave me a refund and then tried to charge me again for what she just gave me a refund on. Sometimes it is just best to not do some one a favor.
Saturday, October 04, 2014
Sold out but disappointed
One might not think it strange that a free concert was booked solid but just because it is free doesn't mean people will take advantage of it. I learned that when our church had a few hot dog supper for the community and no one came. The truth is we could have sold a lot more than we gave away. Anyway, David Jeremiah had a free service at the coliseum Thursday and I enjoy David Jeremiah. I heard him speak live in Myrtle beach at the annual "Singing at the Beach' a few years back and I still remember his message. But Thursday night was a night to forget, for sure.
I believe music should always honor God and reflects His truths. I am not about to speak for God and even propose what type of music God likes to listen too but I have never seen drums listed among the instruments used to praise God in the scriptures. One song claimed that the singer was God's friend because god was his. Friendship implies equality and I just don't feel comfortable equating myself with God. God is my creator and the bible instructs us to fear God and tells us plainly to fear Him who can take both body and soul. Oh I know there is a hymn that says "Oh what a friend we have in Jesus" and I love that him. The difference is that hymn isn't putting us on an equal footing with God but giving God the glory for all the wonderful things that Jesus did for us when He died upon the cross for our sins. The song does not imply that the singer and God are best buddies.
The music I suffered through because I came to hear a message from God and to give praise to Him but instead the sermon was nothing more than a book promotional speech. Yea, I purchased a book because it was on a topic I was interested in and I had looked into buying the book earlier but at $39.95 for the book from Amazon I thought I could find equally as good a resource at a much better price. At the meeting I purchased the book for $20.00 while the music was going on.
What I did enjoy was the Fellowship meeting last night. It was in Albemarle which was a long lonely drive through the countryside in the piedmont of North Carolina and the preachers there were pastors of small churches for sure. No one there will ever pastor a mega church or even draw a crowd at a free event but then again they are preaching the word of God and not trying to sell books.
There is no compromising on the translation of the bible they use, on the type of music that is sung, and no personal agenda to be promoted. They don't talk about their wife and kids or brag about what ministries they are involved in. They just preach the gospel.
There was one preacher there from Kenya who oversees 7 churches and several different programs and only receives support of $250.00 a month. I would much rather support him than David Jeremiah.
Don't get me wrong. I am not putting down David Jeremiah or his ministry. If one can reach people and allow God to save their souls then they have my support. I'm not disappointed and non supportive of the ministry of David Jeremiah: I'm just disappointed that the opportunity to inspired thousands of Christians was used a a promotional opportunity for his new book.
I believe music should always honor God and reflects His truths. I am not about to speak for God and even propose what type of music God likes to listen too but I have never seen drums listed among the instruments used to praise God in the scriptures. One song claimed that the singer was God's friend because god was his. Friendship implies equality and I just don't feel comfortable equating myself with God. God is my creator and the bible instructs us to fear God and tells us plainly to fear Him who can take both body and soul. Oh I know there is a hymn that says "Oh what a friend we have in Jesus" and I love that him. The difference is that hymn isn't putting us on an equal footing with God but giving God the glory for all the wonderful things that Jesus did for us when He died upon the cross for our sins. The song does not imply that the singer and God are best buddies.
The music I suffered through because I came to hear a message from God and to give praise to Him but instead the sermon was nothing more than a book promotional speech. Yea, I purchased a book because it was on a topic I was interested in and I had looked into buying the book earlier but at $39.95 for the book from Amazon I thought I could find equally as good a resource at a much better price. At the meeting I purchased the book for $20.00 while the music was going on.
What I did enjoy was the Fellowship meeting last night. It was in Albemarle which was a long lonely drive through the countryside in the piedmont of North Carolina and the preachers there were pastors of small churches for sure. No one there will ever pastor a mega church or even draw a crowd at a free event but then again they are preaching the word of God and not trying to sell books.
There is no compromising on the translation of the bible they use, on the type of music that is sung, and no personal agenda to be promoted. They don't talk about their wife and kids or brag about what ministries they are involved in. They just preach the gospel.
There was one preacher there from Kenya who oversees 7 churches and several different programs and only receives support of $250.00 a month. I would much rather support him than David Jeremiah.
Don't get me wrong. I am not putting down David Jeremiah or his ministry. If one can reach people and allow God to save their souls then they have my support. I'm not disappointed and non supportive of the ministry of David Jeremiah: I'm just disappointed that the opportunity to inspired thousands of Christians was used a a promotional opportunity for his new book.
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Somebodies lying
The firm I have my retirements funds with keeps sending me encouraging e-mails and reports that tell me the economy is improving and its stronger than the public believes and I should be confident and optimistic about my financial future. That sounds nice but every time I check my holdings I have less than I did the day before. In the last month the value of my investments have decreased a thousand dollars (actually a little more than that) and the last several day has shown decreased of over $80.00 per day.
So if the economy is doing good then why are my investments doing bad? Is some one lying to me?
So if the economy is doing good then why are my investments doing bad? Is some one lying to me?
Sunday, September 28, 2014
Vote no instead
I know the election is still a ways off but listening to the negative campaign aids from Thom Tillis
and Kat Hagan got me to thinking about how we are given choices on the ballet. I believe there should be one more choice given.
At present we can vote for no one or we can no vote for anyone but we are not allowed to vote against a particular candidate. I think we should be allowed that option. That way an against vote would cancel out a for vote. A non vote to me just isn't fair because it is just that: a non-vote. One might as well not even care but you do care. Maybe you believe that neither candidate is the correct one for the office. If you can't vote against someone then those voting for hold all the power and that isn't a true democracy. The law is supposed to allow for one person-one vote but to not vote takes away from your authority as a voter.
I was faced with that dilemma one election when I liked neither candidate so I had to not vote for either. That isn't fair. If I believe neither candidate is good then I should have the right to say so. A vote against counts just as much as a vote for. If both candidates receive more votes against than votes for then the parties would have to choose another candidate. Maybe it would make our politicians more responsible: they not only have to prove their opponent isn't as qualified as they are but also have to prove they are worthy.
and Kat Hagan got me to thinking about how we are given choices on the ballet. I believe there should be one more choice given.
At present we can vote for no one or we can no vote for anyone but we are not allowed to vote against a particular candidate. I think we should be allowed that option. That way an against vote would cancel out a for vote. A non vote to me just isn't fair because it is just that: a non-vote. One might as well not even care but you do care. Maybe you believe that neither candidate is the correct one for the office. If you can't vote against someone then those voting for hold all the power and that isn't a true democracy. The law is supposed to allow for one person-one vote but to not vote takes away from your authority as a voter.
I was faced with that dilemma one election when I liked neither candidate so I had to not vote for either. That isn't fair. If I believe neither candidate is good then I should have the right to say so. A vote against counts just as much as a vote for. If both candidates receive more votes against than votes for then the parties would have to choose another candidate. Maybe it would make our politicians more responsible: they not only have to prove their opponent isn't as qualified as they are but also have to prove they are worthy.
Saturday, September 27, 2014
For Sale, Chairs and podium
Actually, one can have the podium. It has a table attached and makes a great pulpit. The big item we have is some chairs. These chairs were made by chairs for less and retail for $38.00 each. They are the beige fabric with the diamond pattern and they are only a tad over a year old. We now have a new sanctuary and use a red chair and we are planning on using the old sanctuary for a fellowship hall and Sunday School bldg. The chairs take up just a little too much room. They are comfortable with 4' cushions. We are asking $25.00 each and there are 40 chairs.
To see what they look like check out the church chairs on church chairs for less .com.
To see what they look like check out the church chairs on church chairs for less .com.
Friday, September 26, 2014
If you obey all the rules you miss all the fun
Kathryn Hepburn gets credit for the headline. Jesus gets credit for saying " he who saves his own life shall lose it but he who loses his life shall save it. Pretty much the opposite of Kathryn Hepburn's philosophy except that one can still follow Jesus and have fun. Jesus said we could have life and have it more abundantly.
I choose to believe Jesus.
I choose to believe Jesus.
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
Amens don't change the truth
Just because a person is a church goer doesn't mean they go for the right reasons which, yes folks, make them a hypocrite. But that doesn't bother me so much as for me to quit going to church anymore than it would to go to work with someone who doesn't like our employer. Hypocrites are all over the place. Even some people who call themselves Americans have allegiances that lie elsewhere. We can't not do what we believe is right just because someone else who is doing the same things we are just don't agree. The people who uses hypocrites as an excuse not to go to church are just making an excuse and while holding themselves out to be just a little better than a hypocrite are, in fact, probable not as good. One is a subtle liar and the other is more bold-faced about it but it really doesn't matter as a lie is a lie.
People are people whether in church or at work. Sometimes people have bad habits and at a meeting the boss wants to try and correct bad habits without calling names and embarrassing people by describing the bad behavior and asking that people not act that way. It seems like the worst offenders are the loudest defenders of the request. In other words they are yelling amen when they should be groaning o-me.
Agreeing loudly doesn't change the truth about your past behavior nor does it convince anyone that they are wrong about you. It just makes you look more foolish than you did before.
People are people whether in church or at work. Sometimes people have bad habits and at a meeting the boss wants to try and correct bad habits without calling names and embarrassing people by describing the bad behavior and asking that people not act that way. It seems like the worst offenders are the loudest defenders of the request. In other words they are yelling amen when they should be groaning o-me.
Agreeing loudly doesn't change the truth about your past behavior nor does it convince anyone that they are wrong about you. It just makes you look more foolish than you did before.
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
How to discipline children
I adopted my son when he was 2 years old. When he was six I took care of a newborn whose mother was a prostitute and whose father was the husband of her grandmother. I then became a foster parent and had several teenagers to care for. Then my sister-in-law moved in with my wife and I and she had two sons, both preschoolers and then she gave birth to a girl.
My wife wasn't enthusiastic about being a foster parent and she was too involved in her own social life to care much for any of the kids, sad to say, so most of the child rearing duties fell to me. It wasn't always easy but I learned as I went. I was a young military man fresh from one war and ready to do it again when I adopted my son. He was a little bitty fellow and I enjoyed him immensely. But the was a tenderhearted boy and if it didn't come easy for him he just didn't try. For me that was frustrating. I am the type of person that keeps at something until I have mastered it or accomplished my task or goal so it was a little frustrating with him. He was a good kid most of the time and he always showed himself to be a man of his word so there really wasn't any need to use corporal punishment with him. I believe I did a few times but I believe those times were more my shortcomings than his.
The last little girls I raised was a pure pleasure. She was cute, mature, sweet, and knew what she liked and wanted. Of all the children I helped raise she was the one that brought me the greatest joy. Only once did I ever see the child upset. She had a dress that came in two pieces: one piece was a solid white dress that was really frilly and the other piece was sheer and had strawberries drawn on it and was to be worn over the dress. One day she had gotten dressed for church and had decided she wanted to wear that outfit. Her grandmother put the white dress on her put didn't want to bother with the other part. The child wasn't happy and she became upset. Her grandmother started yelling at her and at one point even pulled back her open hand as if to strike the child.
I heard the commotion and asked what was the matter. "I explained to her grandmother that the dress was in two parts and while it could be wore separately, the child felt naked without the dress being complete. She understood and dressed her properly.
I wish I had known how to do with my son what I learned by the time I raised my last child. I learned that each child is different so rules and discipline and play time and all the activities that make up a family have to be different for each child. A parent cannot be a child's friend yet it isn't necessary to be the power broker either. I learned to respect each child for the unique person they were and deal with them from a point of respect for their feelings and their needs. A child looks to a grownup for love, support and guidance and needs our validation. They don't need our harsh words, orders, or impatient demands.
Corporal punishment does have its place. I remember once on a family and friend outing there were several of us playing horseshoes and one boy would wait until someone was ready to toss their shoes to run out in front of them. He thought it funny to disrupt our game. I cautioned the lad three times about the danger and rudeness of his actions but that only seemed to make him more determined. In my last caution to the kid I also included the punishment for not heeding my request. When I swatted his butt he had a shocked look on his face as he had always been allowed to do what he wanted to do, even making fun of his parents, with never a correction. The swat was never intended to hurt but to enforce the seriousness of the situation. Being struck by a thrown horseshoe would have been at the very least painful and it would have been irresponsible of us adults not to take proper steps to prevent injury to the boy.
Corporal punishment must be a tool in successful parenting but one that should be used sparingly if ever. Your main tool should be respect for the child and his opinions, viewing the world through the child's eyes, and recognizing the uniqueness of each individual and dealing with the situation in a rmanner that is best for that particular child.
My wife wasn't enthusiastic about being a foster parent and she was too involved in her own social life to care much for any of the kids, sad to say, so most of the child rearing duties fell to me. It wasn't always easy but I learned as I went. I was a young military man fresh from one war and ready to do it again when I adopted my son. He was a little bitty fellow and I enjoyed him immensely. But the was a tenderhearted boy and if it didn't come easy for him he just didn't try. For me that was frustrating. I am the type of person that keeps at something until I have mastered it or accomplished my task or goal so it was a little frustrating with him. He was a good kid most of the time and he always showed himself to be a man of his word so there really wasn't any need to use corporal punishment with him. I believe I did a few times but I believe those times were more my shortcomings than his.
The last little girls I raised was a pure pleasure. She was cute, mature, sweet, and knew what she liked and wanted. Of all the children I helped raise she was the one that brought me the greatest joy. Only once did I ever see the child upset. She had a dress that came in two pieces: one piece was a solid white dress that was really frilly and the other piece was sheer and had strawberries drawn on it and was to be worn over the dress. One day she had gotten dressed for church and had decided she wanted to wear that outfit. Her grandmother put the white dress on her put didn't want to bother with the other part. The child wasn't happy and she became upset. Her grandmother started yelling at her and at one point even pulled back her open hand as if to strike the child.
I heard the commotion and asked what was the matter. "I explained to her grandmother that the dress was in two parts and while it could be wore separately, the child felt naked without the dress being complete. She understood and dressed her properly.
I wish I had known how to do with my son what I learned by the time I raised my last child. I learned that each child is different so rules and discipline and play time and all the activities that make up a family have to be different for each child. A parent cannot be a child's friend yet it isn't necessary to be the power broker either. I learned to respect each child for the unique person they were and deal with them from a point of respect for their feelings and their needs. A child looks to a grownup for love, support and guidance and needs our validation. They don't need our harsh words, orders, or impatient demands.
Corporal punishment does have its place. I remember once on a family and friend outing there were several of us playing horseshoes and one boy would wait until someone was ready to toss their shoes to run out in front of them. He thought it funny to disrupt our game. I cautioned the lad three times about the danger and rudeness of his actions but that only seemed to make him more determined. In my last caution to the kid I also included the punishment for not heeding my request. When I swatted his butt he had a shocked look on his face as he had always been allowed to do what he wanted to do, even making fun of his parents, with never a correction. The swat was never intended to hurt but to enforce the seriousness of the situation. Being struck by a thrown horseshoe would have been at the very least painful and it would have been irresponsible of us adults not to take proper steps to prevent injury to the boy.
Corporal punishment must be a tool in successful parenting but one that should be used sparingly if ever. Your main tool should be respect for the child and his opinions, viewing the world through the child's eyes, and recognizing the uniqueness of each individual and dealing with the situation in a rmanner that is best for that particular child.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Granny Smith is blooming
I was a little concerned when I found my Granny Smith blooming so I did some research and found it was due to the dry summer with a cool spell followed by a warm wet spell. It makes a tree think spring is here. I am concerned because my Granny Smith is the pollinator for my Fuji trees. My crabapple died and my replacement tree hasn't arrived yet (in the spring).
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
I wish this were true
I just received the following e-mail. I wish there were a kind lady out there willing to donate to the church rather than some evil person trying to take advantage of some poor greedy soul.
I am Mrs. Nicole Maoris , I am a dying woman who have decided to donate what I have to you/churches/ motherless babies/less privileged/widows’ was diagnosed for cancer for about 2 years ago. I have been touched by god to donate from what I have inherited from my late husband to you for good work of god. I have asked god to forgive me and believe he has because he is a merciful god I will be going in for an operation soon.
I decided to will/donate the sum of $ 2.5 million dollars to you for the good work of god, and also to help the motherless and less privilege and also forth assistance of the widows. At the moment I cannot take any telephone calls right now due to the fact that my relatives (that have squandered the funds I gave them for this purpose before) are around me and my health status also. I have adjusted my will and my lawyer is aware.
I wish you all the best and May the good God bless you abundantly, and please use the funds judiciously and always extend the good work to others. As soon you get back to me, I shall give you info on what I need from you then you will contact the bank and tell them I have willed those properties to you by quoting my personal file routing and account information. And I have also notified the bank that I am willing that properties to you for a good, effective and prudent work. I know I don't know you but I have been directed to do this by god.
Yours faithful friend.
Mrs. Nicole Maoris.
Mrs. Nicole Maoris.
5 signs it’s time to look for a new job
This is from an article on Yahoo
1. Boredom
2. Bad relationship with the boss
3. Company struggling
4. company giving you hints
5. great Job Offer
The longest I ever worked at one job was 5 years and the longest I ever stayed at one company was 10. I did get bored easily.
For the most part I've always had the respect of my bosses; even the ones that didn't like me personally, but there have been a time or two when I had to get before I was gotten rid of. Once I was being used as a pawn in a disagreement between the manager and the assistant manager. During one of their arguments my boss asked me how I felt and I told the truth. It made him mad and he knew that in order for him to gain control of the department either his assistant or I had to go and he figured it was easier to get rid of me. When I met with upper management I was granted a transfer.
I've worked for eleven different companies over a fifty year period of time, six of which have been regional leaders or national chains. Seven out of the eleven are no longer in business, two had closed all there operations in my area, and of the remaining two, one was recently sold. All but one seemed to be healthy and growing when I left.
I did find myself in a bad situation once. The company had just purchased another company and I was in charge of converting three of the stores from the former owner to our way of doing business. A woman from a company crew sent to help made a financial transaction that was against company policy and when I reported the incident my job was threatened because the woman happened to be the girlfriend of one of the directors. He did his best to get rid of me but I kept my nose clean and was one of the best at my job. He did however prevent me from getting promoted twice.
I've never had a company seek me how for a potential job but I've never had a problem securing employment when seeking a job. Of course, it has always been my rule never to leave one place of employment before having another job lined up. It's kind of hard to negotiate salary when you don't have one and I'd rather explain why I want to work for a different company than to explain why I'm no longer working for anyone.
1. Boredom
2. Bad relationship with the boss
3. Company struggling
4. company giving you hints
5. great Job Offer
The longest I ever worked at one job was 5 years and the longest I ever stayed at one company was 10. I did get bored easily.
For the most part I've always had the respect of my bosses; even the ones that didn't like me personally, but there have been a time or two when I had to get before I was gotten rid of. Once I was being used as a pawn in a disagreement between the manager and the assistant manager. During one of their arguments my boss asked me how I felt and I told the truth. It made him mad and he knew that in order for him to gain control of the department either his assistant or I had to go and he figured it was easier to get rid of me. When I met with upper management I was granted a transfer.
I've worked for eleven different companies over a fifty year period of time, six of which have been regional leaders or national chains. Seven out of the eleven are no longer in business, two had closed all there operations in my area, and of the remaining two, one was recently sold. All but one seemed to be healthy and growing when I left.
I did find myself in a bad situation once. The company had just purchased another company and I was in charge of converting three of the stores from the former owner to our way of doing business. A woman from a company crew sent to help made a financial transaction that was against company policy and when I reported the incident my job was threatened because the woman happened to be the girlfriend of one of the directors. He did his best to get rid of me but I kept my nose clean and was one of the best at my job. He did however prevent me from getting promoted twice.
I've never had a company seek me how for a potential job but I've never had a problem securing employment when seeking a job. Of course, it has always been my rule never to leave one place of employment before having another job lined up. It's kind of hard to negotiate salary when you don't have one and I'd rather explain why I want to work for a different company than to explain why I'm no longer working for anyone.
Tuesday, September 09, 2014
My last bully
When I was in the ninth grade we had a new kid come into my class near the end of the school year. he was a tall, good-looking blonde guy with an athletic muscular build but he didn't play any sports that I knew of. He took a seat to the right of me and seemed to be rather quiet. One day I got to school early and when I walked into the classroom this kid asked me if I knew what a Charlie Horse was. Before I had a chance to respond he grabbed my left arm and pinched me on the forearm by grabbing skin and muscle between two knuckles. It hurt and my arm swelled up.
The next morning when I got to class he laughed and grabbed my arm again but this time I pulled away from him. He then grabbed me by my shoulders and kneed me in my left thing. Needless to say it hurt so bad I limped for most of the day.
The next day when I got to class he reach he grabbed me by my shoulders again and when I saw him pull his leg back to knee me again I shoved him. He lost his balance and fell backwards through a couple rows of desks. He was embarrassed and that made him mad to be embarrassed. He told me he would be waiting for me behind the gym when I got out of school for the day.
I was hoping he had changed his mind or forgotten about it. I really didn't want to fight him as he was 10 inches taller and probably outweighed me by 40 or 50 pounds and there wasn't an ounce of fat on the kid anywhere. Unfortunately for me I walked home from school and I had to walk past the gym on my way home. There was no way around that route home so I was really hoping he wasn't there. Well not only was he there but he invited lots of people to view my beat down. I tried to ignore hem but after being taunted I knew he would never leave me alone if I backed down plus I would leave myself open to ridicule from some of the other kids. As I walked towards him I handed my school books to a friend and took off my shirt so it wouldn't get ripped and/or soiled.
He stood there waiting for me with his fists clenched and I walked up to him he said something like how he was going to teach me a lesson. Before he could utter another word I hit him as hard as I could aiming for that sweet spot where the nose and eye meet. I believe he was more surprised than hurt and he swung back at me but he only connected with my left shoulder. It felt like he broke it as this guy was incredibly strong.
With guys taller than me I like to take them off their feet as it makes things more even but this dude was just too stout for that move. All I could do was strike out at him as fast as I could in hopes of delaying the inevitable. To my great surprise after the third or fourth time I hit him he started to cry and just turned and walked away.
No we didn't become friends He did move to another part of the room and never spoke to me or bothered me again. neither did anyone else.
I've since learned that there are much better ways to handle problems rather than physically but in the neighborhood I lived in until I was twelve fighting was a way of life. It had nothing to do with getting mad and settling differences but it seems it was just for the sport or fun of it. I learned early on that the one who threw the first blow had the best chance of winning and taking your opponent by surprise up the odds in my favor a lot more. If you were bigger than me, and if you were my age or older than you were, I had to find ways to better my odds. The older I got the bigger difference between me and others became. Fortunately for me I was athletic and wiry and fast and I was never the type of person who gave up. I don't care how much I hurt or how big the disadvantage I was going to keep coming at you until you gave up or some one broke the fight up.
I remember a high school friend of mine named Buddy D. I never knew if his name was really Buddy or if that was just a nickname but we were good friends for the last few years of high school. Even so I was surprised when he said he was going to the same college I was going too. In fact, he said, he wanted to be my roommate.
Well we hadn't been in school but just a few days when Buddy moved out of my room. No explanation; he just moved. Well, a few days later I finished my last class and as I was heading to my room there was some kids playing a pickup game of football. I was asked to join them. To my surprise my high school friend was playing on the opposition. I had been a good runner as I was slim and fast but I could run over a blocker too as I was much stronger than I looked like I should be. I soon became a favorite ball handler on my new team as I ran for a couple of scores and moved the ball for yardage on a couple of other plays. On one play I took the ball and was going to run up the middle and Buddy was the tackler. I was taken by surprise when he threw a roll block on me. I not only took a face full of grass and dirt but a great deal of laughter from my team mates.
A few plays later I again took the ball and ran up the middle and again Buddy was the tackler. He again threw a roll block but this time I just jumped over him and went on to score the touchdown. Well, Buddy got mad and stormed off the field. I never saw the guy again as the next day he put in for a transfer to another college. I never did find out what made him so angry. I would rather him to have just walked up to me and slugged me as to end our friendship without a word. That was the cruelest blow of all.
The next morning when I got to class he laughed and grabbed my arm again but this time I pulled away from him. He then grabbed me by my shoulders and kneed me in my left thing. Needless to say it hurt so bad I limped for most of the day.
The next day when I got to class he reach he grabbed me by my shoulders again and when I saw him pull his leg back to knee me again I shoved him. He lost his balance and fell backwards through a couple rows of desks. He was embarrassed and that made him mad to be embarrassed. He told me he would be waiting for me behind the gym when I got out of school for the day.
I was hoping he had changed his mind or forgotten about it. I really didn't want to fight him as he was 10 inches taller and probably outweighed me by 40 or 50 pounds and there wasn't an ounce of fat on the kid anywhere. Unfortunately for me I walked home from school and I had to walk past the gym on my way home. There was no way around that route home so I was really hoping he wasn't there. Well not only was he there but he invited lots of people to view my beat down. I tried to ignore hem but after being taunted I knew he would never leave me alone if I backed down plus I would leave myself open to ridicule from some of the other kids. As I walked towards him I handed my school books to a friend and took off my shirt so it wouldn't get ripped and/or soiled.
He stood there waiting for me with his fists clenched and I walked up to him he said something like how he was going to teach me a lesson. Before he could utter another word I hit him as hard as I could aiming for that sweet spot where the nose and eye meet. I believe he was more surprised than hurt and he swung back at me but he only connected with my left shoulder. It felt like he broke it as this guy was incredibly strong.
With guys taller than me I like to take them off their feet as it makes things more even but this dude was just too stout for that move. All I could do was strike out at him as fast as I could in hopes of delaying the inevitable. To my great surprise after the third or fourth time I hit him he started to cry and just turned and walked away.
No we didn't become friends He did move to another part of the room and never spoke to me or bothered me again. neither did anyone else.
I've since learned that there are much better ways to handle problems rather than physically but in the neighborhood I lived in until I was twelve fighting was a way of life. It had nothing to do with getting mad and settling differences but it seems it was just for the sport or fun of it. I learned early on that the one who threw the first blow had the best chance of winning and taking your opponent by surprise up the odds in my favor a lot more. If you were bigger than me, and if you were my age or older than you were, I had to find ways to better my odds. The older I got the bigger difference between me and others became. Fortunately for me I was athletic and wiry and fast and I was never the type of person who gave up. I don't care how much I hurt or how big the disadvantage I was going to keep coming at you until you gave up or some one broke the fight up.
I remember a high school friend of mine named Buddy D. I never knew if his name was really Buddy or if that was just a nickname but we were good friends for the last few years of high school. Even so I was surprised when he said he was going to the same college I was going too. In fact, he said, he wanted to be my roommate.
Well we hadn't been in school but just a few days when Buddy moved out of my room. No explanation; he just moved. Well, a few days later I finished my last class and as I was heading to my room there was some kids playing a pickup game of football. I was asked to join them. To my surprise my high school friend was playing on the opposition. I had been a good runner as I was slim and fast but I could run over a blocker too as I was much stronger than I looked like I should be. I soon became a favorite ball handler on my new team as I ran for a couple of scores and moved the ball for yardage on a couple of other plays. On one play I took the ball and was going to run up the middle and Buddy was the tackler. I was taken by surprise when he threw a roll block on me. I not only took a face full of grass and dirt but a great deal of laughter from my team mates.
A few plays later I again took the ball and ran up the middle and again Buddy was the tackler. He again threw a roll block but this time I just jumped over him and went on to score the touchdown. Well, Buddy got mad and stormed off the field. I never saw the guy again as the next day he put in for a transfer to another college. I never did find out what made him so angry. I would rather him to have just walked up to me and slugged me as to end our friendship without a word. That was the cruelest blow of all.
Friday, September 05, 2014
Candid Camera stunt was just wrong
Reminiscent of the show "What would you do" Candid Camera did a stunt involving illegal aliens, one from Mexico and one from England. Each person would stand on the street and ask passerby's to sign a petition allowing them to stay in the USA. The Englishman was dressed nicely in a suit was easy spoken and well dressed. The Mexican was dressed in a corduroy shirt that was unbuttoned, a T-shirt and faded jeans. He looked like an unemployed laborer.
The stunt smelled like a bad political statement rather than a study of human nature. At least "What would you do" would have the two men switch rolls and have a well dressed Mexican and a worker-type Englishman. And to be totally fair, they very well could have done the stunt using the same person in both roles and then repeat the performance using ladies. Then we would have a better idea if there was a racial, ethnic, gender, or cultural bias to peoples reactions.
The fact that this stunt was done in Arizona was neither typical of the locals nor fair to them. Peter Funt should be ashamed for that stunt. it was just wrong.
The stunt smelled like a bad political statement rather than a study of human nature. At least "What would you do" would have the two men switch rolls and have a well dressed Mexican and a worker-type Englishman. And to be totally fair, they very well could have done the stunt using the same person in both roles and then repeat the performance using ladies. Then we would have a better idea if there was a racial, ethnic, gender, or cultural bias to peoples reactions.
The fact that this stunt was done in Arizona was neither typical of the locals nor fair to them. Peter Funt should be ashamed for that stunt. it was just wrong.
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